I know I said I would strictly stick to vlogs but I decided to make an exception tonight. This past 10 years were the hardest years of my life. A lot of personal demons to struggle with; not that I don't have any to deal with in this brand new decade. In this new decade I really would like to change things about myself for the better. Not just so that I can feel good, it's also so that everyone else who has me in their lives could feel good too. Specifically my parents, who I've put through a lot of shit with from 2000-2010. I guess you can say my arrival as a responsible adult has not completely arrived since I left the blissful 90's. I'm still a naive human being with so much more to learn in life.
Here's an interesting story: we played a game within our group of family friends to describe one word about myself. I chose 'adamant'. It was something I was proud of but it was ironically my hubris as well. It meant that I could have a strong conviction for something and that I would never relent; but sometimes those feelings would lead to something negative. A Pyrrhic victory for my personality.
This hesitance and tendency to be indecisive coupled with my often temporary adamance can really lead me through a very hard path in life.
I haven't been the most spiritual person as the years have gone by, but somewhere deep in me, I still entrust my life with God.
I wish all of you a prosperous new year and a great decade. God bless.
Wow, I said decade a lot. Now it's starting to sound like a weird word....
Alan
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